LAST DAY

Yesterday was my last day of radiation treatment!  And what a day it was.  Just pure joy, thankfulness, another undescribable, words-just-can't-touch-it-kind-of-day.  But of course, I will haplessly attempt it...

I picked up celebratory cupcakes at Crushcakes Cupcakery (they were fabulously accomodating, again!) for all of my my now dear friends at the Cancer Center of Santa Barbara, Santa Barbara County Clinic and Pharmacy, and other doctors.  As I went to my final treatment, last day appointments and picked up my new assortment of medicine for the steroid taper-down (WOO HOO!) that will occur over the next month, I found myself sad to say goodbye, but hoping the next time I see them is at the grocery store, in a restaurant, or the theatre.  Where I will run up and give them hugs, and they'll wonder who is this girl, all healthy, and with hair?

So what's next for Girlbert?  Well, there's certainly no going back to normal, since there never really was a normal to begin with. 

But I tried as best I could to allow myself to do as much of NOTHING as I could muster today.  Boyfriend, too.  But with all the activity, the schedule of having to be SOMEWHERE, six days a week, often changing multiple times a day, with a moment's notice, there's certainly a lot of catching up to be done.  Medi-Cal denial still waiting in the wings.  Social Security paperwork and requirements to tidy up.  Charity applications to fill out.  And the regular stuff of figuring out how to cook, clean, and work to pay rent and bills.

My next MRI and doctor follow-up appointments aren't for over a month - after the holidays.  My doctors tell me that although the chemo and radiation have stopped, changes will continue to occur over the next month, and so a picture and any discussion aren't necessary until then.  So more wait and see.  But time to rest and enjoy the holidays, which is a tremendous blessing!

And finally, some more attention for my horse.  I might even read a book or a magazine.  Or take a picture of a bird.  Let the real healing begin.